• Public Health

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01 July 2011Most parents and carers know that, just like learning how to play or talk, sexual development is a part of human development. We know that it will happen whether we talk with our children about sexual matters or not.

Despite living through a couple of sexual revolutions, many parents are still nervous about the topic. Many of us grew up when talking about sex (within the family) wasn’t done. So we feel we don’t have a model to copy, or at least one that we would be happy to repeat. This is especially true for men. At least girls got some information about periods and babies (from Mum) but boys (now men) often missed out on any sort of parent talk about their bodies, sex and relationships. One thing we did get from the sexual revolution (or from watching daytime talk shows) is a fear about what we adults might do to a child’s sexuality. And that’s what worries us. We can be so worried about getting it right, perfectly right, that we end up saying nothing at all.

You might be relieved to know that helping your child towards a happy, healthy sexuality does not come from any One Big Talk that you have to get perfectly scripted. You might also be glad to know that talking with your children about sexuality will not make them go out and do it. In fact, talking about sex with young people has the opposite effect.

It’s not one big talk, but lots of little conversations.

Repeated.